DavemiConflict Style Test
Answer 20 quick questions to discover how you handle disagreements — and when your style helps or hurts.
About the five conflict styles
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps how we handle conflict along two dials: how much we assert our own needs and how much we cooperate with others. Where those two meet produces five styles — and the best communicators can move between them depending on what a situation calls for.
- Competing — high assertiveness: you push for your position.
- Collaborating — high both: you find a win-win.
- Compromising — middle ground: everyone gives a little.
- Avoiding — low both: you sidestep the conflict.
- Accommodating — high cooperation: you put others first.
FAQ
- What are the five conflict styles?
- Competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, and accommodating — based on the well-known Thomas-Kilmann model. Each balances how much you assert your own needs versus cooperate with others.
- Is one style the best?
- Not universally. Collaborating builds the strongest outcomes, but every style has its moment — competing in a crisis, avoiding for trivial issues, accommodating when the relationship matters most. Flexibility is the real skill.
- Can I change how I handle conflict?
- Yes. Your style is a set of habits shaped by experience, and with awareness you can widen your range and choose the approach that fits each situation.
- Is my data saved?
- No. Everything runs in your browser and nothing is stored.
Every possible result
There are 5 possible outcomes on this test. Here's what each one means — take the quiz above to find out which is yours.
Competing
Assertive and goal-driven.
You stand firm and push for your position — powerful in a crisis or when you're clearly right. Just watch that it doesn't steamroll the people and relationships around you.
- Assertive
- Decisive
- Direct
Collaborating
The win-win problem solver.
You dig into the real issue to find a solution that genuinely works for everyone. It takes effort and trust, but it builds the strongest outcomes and relationships.
- Cooperative
- Creative
- Fair
Compromising
Fair and pragmatic.
You find the middle ground quickly so everyone gets something and you can move on. Efficient and even-handed — though the fastest deal isn't always the most satisfying one.
- Balanced
- Practical
- Even-handed
Avoiding
Conflict-averse and cautious.
You'd rather step back than get into it, which keeps the peace in the short term. For the issues that really matter, though, leaning in a little will serve you better.
- Calm
- Cautious
- Peace-keeping
Accommodating
Generous and relationship-first.
You often put others' needs above your own to keep harmony. It's kind and selfless — just make sure your own needs get met too, so you don't quietly burn out.
- Generous
- Selfless
- Harmonizing
All 20 questions in this test
- In a conflict, I push firmly for what I think is right.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I stand my ground even when others disagree.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- Winning the argument matters to me.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I make firm decisions and defend them.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I look for a solution that satisfies everyone.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I dig into the real issue so we can solve it together.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I value both my goals and the relationship equally.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I bring people together to find a win-win.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I look for a middle ground quickly.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I'll give a little to get a little.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I'm happy to split the difference and move on.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- A fair, fast deal beats a perfect one.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I'd rather sidestep a conflict than face it.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I stay quiet and hope tension blows over.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I withdraw when things get heated.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I put off difficult conversations.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I often give in to keep others happy.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I put the relationship above being right.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I yield to avoid upsetting people.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
- I let others have their way to keep harmony.
- Rarely me
- Sometimes me
- Often me
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